Encumbrance

If only i had an Invisibility Cloak. :[
If only i cld make potions that eradicate pain and capture hearts. :[[
If only Neverland really existed. :[[[
If only i wasnt 18. :[[[[
If only i wasnt so slow. :[[[[[

Then things would be more or less perfect.

I need to step outside
Just to see if I can breathe
I gotta find a way out
Maybe there's a way out

We all have diff priorities.diff ideas on what we should commit ourselves to.i dont think its fair that we coerce (yes,coerce) each other into dng things that are not within our abilities.if i were a superhero,i swear i wld fly there every day.i wld control time so that it passes slowly and i gt to do everything within my limits.i wld clinch it all.everything.fer myself,fer them.perhaps i rly made a wrong choice at that pt of time,bt now tt its almost completed,i nd to do my best.to watch oneself die and not be able to save oneself is a very horrid feeling indeed.to watch others climb up triumphantly while one deflates is the worst nightmare.to noe that others can do what one cannot do...that sucks.

Yeah I'm walking on a tightrope
I'm wrapped up in vines
I think I'll make it out
But you just gotta give me time

Time is the monster that lies beneath.definitely.i've been dng this since forever and it doesnt seem to work out the way i want it to.god.mbe the problem lies with me.mbe i've gt some sort of disorder that mashes up my coherence and life-planning skills.and nt to mention the inability to get through a week without knocking into or over smth.

"Sorry" used to be the hardest word.now,it doesnt seem hard fer ppl to apologise.they do it without sincerity tho.nt that i care.i noe,at least,that when i apologise,i truly mean it.just like how i mean it when i say i miss someone.its nt my attitude problem.its your perception problem.NOW i noe how true it is.my badge actually makes more sense now.

I wld haf written all these in my diary like always.bt i cldnt stop myself.im sure we all had these moments before.when things build up within you and you feel this need to let it all out.like right at that instant.if i had walked over to my bag and took out my diary and settled down to write,i probably wld haf ended with just a paragraph,and i wldnt haf felt any better.

Smth i heard today.old-fashioned and cheesy but cute nevertheless.
"do u have a map?cos i think i gt lost in your eyes."